Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Back Update and Going Forward

Mr. Goat's MRI came back as well as could possibly be expected (Yay no surgery!) ... so he will probably be able to lift babies in about a month.  I'm trying to figure out what we do in the interim.

Right now, my mother in law is in town (she lives in College Station, TX, about 6 hours away).  She has been sleeping on an air mattress in Monkey's bedroom every other night, and my parents are taking the babies the other nights, mostly.  This weekend my parents are having a ginormous three day party, so we'll be doing babies by ourselves all weekend.  She is a wonderful human being, but she has spent her entire life in academia, and she has no head whatsoever for efficiency.  Also, she has a tendency to mother Mr. Goat like he is about 12, which can cause some friction, especially since she is here on our request, and she is really helping out a lot.

I need to think of some way to make this work that does not involve my mother in law living here for another month.

On October 12, we have an au pair arriving from France.  I hope that she will be a help, but I expect that the first couple of weeks will be a difficult transition for her.  Until then, my brother's fiancee helps out where she can, to the tune of 30-40 hours a week.  My parents also help out when they can, which includes taking the babies all night 2 or 3 nights a week.

So I think I can make it work.  I just have to get through the weekend and get a schedule of assistance put together so I know when I can rest.

On a total tangent, I stopped pumping for Monkey and Football last week, and will be feeding them frozen breast milk for the next month until they reach the one year mark.  It is so nice to have my body completely back to myself!

Friday, September 21, 2012

Implementation Phase One

I talked to my parents and they are going to give me the money.  I am incredibly lucky that I can do this, but I sure wish that I didn't have to.

On Monday Mr. Goat goes in for X-Rays and MRIs and we'll get a better idea of whether we are looking at few more weeks of rest or back surgery in the immediate future.  And its open enrollment season, so I have to decide whether to bet for or against back surgery in my plan selection by the end of the month.  No pressure:)

I'm off to take care of babies.  No news is good news for the rest of the weekend.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Some Decisions Made ...

After a long, and on my part tearful, conversation with my pastor (there's a job I never want to have to do), I've come to a realization and some decisions:

Realization: This is legitimately a crisis.  The definition if crisis (not literally, but in my book) is something that you can't fix by just working harder, you have to change what you are doing to resolve it.

Therefore:  (1) I need to suck it up and borrow 3 months living expenses from my parents.  Hopefully I won't need it all, but that way I am covered until the end of January.  I cried about this for a long time, because I am so sad to go back into the cycle of needing to pay down debt; I really thought that this time having a 6 month EF would save me.  However, I have health issues that require me to have 9 hours of sleep a night or my whole body breaks down.  I cannot possibly take a new job while trying to manage babies and husband without a health breakdown.  I have to take the long view here.

(2) I need to eliminate all unnecessary stress from my life until the crisis passes.  For instance, I've been doing Weight Watchers since April (and lost nearly 20 lbs!) but I need to let go of that right now; I just don't have the energy.  Someone else is cooking all my meals, so I have no control over what gets fixed, and it will make me crazy to try to eat within my points.  I'll just have to lose any weight I gain back after this is over.  I am also not attending meetings for any clubs or any other fun things that I could do instead of sleep.  I'm giving myself a pass on blogging since I need it for stress relief.  I will also keep working out for the same reason.

(3) As soon as this crisis is over, I have to get a job.  Not having any control over our incoming income is driving me crazy.  I need to figure out what I want to get a job doing now that my dream job fell through and make that my dream.  If that doesn't work, I need to move on and find another dream.  I've allowed the perfect to become the enemy of the good in this instance.  But this is something to worry about after Mr. Goat can lift babies again, not this week.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Time to Put on the Big Girl Pants

In January this year, I was flying high because, for the first time since I went to law school, I had a positive net worth.  In May, I confidently anticipated that I would be able to make all my financial goals for the year.  Then Mr. Goat decided to quit his job, which he hated, and look for part-time work so that he could take care of the babies while I looked for a job.  I figured we had six months of expenses saved, Mr. Goat practically had a new job lined up, and we were good to go.


First, we overspent in June and July, leaving us only 5 months of living expenses.  Then, Mr. Goat's potential job strung him along for two months, and even now don't have the balls to tell him that it just isn't going to happen. (OK, to be fair, the guy he was talking to really wants to hire him, and I think truly believes that somehow a miracle will occur and he will get the authorization to do so.  But it's still a PITA).  I had an interview and was informed that I was a top candidate for what looked to be a dream job, and then the national organization announced an hiring freeze of indefinite duration last week and I was informed that I would not be hired after all.  (Although, once hiring commences again, I should feel free to re-apply).  Finally, Mr. Goat ruptured a disc in his back this weekend and, even though we have paid more than $4000 to COBRA, our insurance shows us as not covered, meaning everything will come out of pocket until I can get this straightened out.

So, in short, I have 6 weeks and one day before I run out of money, Mr. Goat won't be able to lift anything (including babies) for at least two weeks and probably much longer, and will be on pain meds for at least two weeks which make him a zombie and unable to look for a job.

My assets are first, my parents are helping with childcare, and they previously gifted Mr. Goat and I with an au pair for the year, who will arrive in mid-October.  Second, I took the bar exam, and the results come out on October 12, which means that I should be licensed to practice law in Louisiana shortly thereafter.  Finally, my mother-in-law, who is retired, should get in today and will stay for an indefinite duration to help with babies as well.

My options are:

(1) Borrow money from my parents until Mr. Goat or I gets a job (probably doable by January).  I'm lucky enough to have parents who have the resources to help me out if necessary.  But I still owe them for the last time they helped me out, and I don't want to borrow more money from them.

(2) Borrow money from sources other than my parents.  Less distasteful than option 1, but silly, as why pay more?  And it creates the same problem of putting me further back into the debt hole.

(3) Try to figure out how to get a job with a paycheck between now and October 31st.  This will probably require that I do something less than my dream job, and just take what is available.  It will also require me to focus with gazelle-like intensity on finding something, which is pretty hard to do considering that I'll be the primary caregiver for three people for at least the next two weeks.

(4) ?

Prayers would be much appreciated.